Soft hair on my face tickles me awake A small voice Mom there is something wrong with my body I’m wide awake, but it is still night time The clock, the only light teases us with its numbered face, 7:15 No sweetie I reply it is morning time it’s just dark outside today Sleepiness, my costume, mirrors calm we read morning stories by lamp light time to get ready for school! discordant in the dim room The soft padding of small feet on stairs I leap from bed to window the sun hangs feebly in eastern sky red disc muted and dull It is day two of zoom school and feigning normalcy is the new gold standard of parenting we turn on lights, power the screen I want to shout it is not your body that is wrong, child, it is the world! I kiss soft hair as I walk past turn the air filters up high the darkened windows reflect her image body dwarfed by the monitor which she stares at dutifully distant as the hidden sun a teacher attempts to wrangle a class of 6-year olds from her square in the box All day we are flooded with photos the golden gate bridge the blood red light and the word “apocalypse” Inside homes across the bay we make forts, play dance games smoke so thick it erases the sun is just another day
Category Archives: Climate distress
Trauma Anniversaries in a Changing World
Originally published in the Climate Psychology Alliance-North America blog Spring has sprung early again this year in Northern California. And with temperatures at a record setting 90 degrees last week, it appears to be ending early too. It took my New York body a long time to adjust to California’s Mediterranean climate when I first…… Continue Reading
When the Tubbs Fire Changed My World and My Practice: Holding Space in the Era of Climate Crisis
Originally Published in the Climate Psychology Alliance – North America Blog Psychotherapists, regardless of our theoretical background or treatment modality, share a common critical capacity: the ability to hold space for difficult emotions and experiences. This capacity is hard to measure, define, or teach. It entails a moment-by-moment dance of empathy, compassion, presence, self-reflection, and…… Continue Reading
British Petroleum will Manipulate Me No More
I don’t remember when I first heard of the Carbon Footprint. But over the years, the idea escalated from a troubling thought into an obsession. The average American puts 16 tons of carbon into the atmosphere each year. That is 4 times the global average, and 16 times more emissions than people in the global…… Continue Reading
A Tale of Two Fires: 25 Years in California
When I was 20 years old, I worked as a counselor at a backpacking camp in California’s Trinity Alps mountains. An East Coast city-girl by birth, I loved camping and hiking and mountains but I’d never seen a peak above 3000 feet, and I’d never set foot in the wilderness. That summer, I was graced…… Continue Reading